Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park mix episode II
by jpwriter
Summary: New characters...new story...the same retardness. I will add a chapter with the more reviews I get. Chapter 5 is up. Read chap5 or else you will encounter a penny bouncing on a trampoline, Which is not good... I think
1. Chapter 1

The electrifying sequel to: Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park mix. Filled with action, adventure, Stupidity, action, adventure, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity, stupidity,stupidity,stupidity,stupidity,stup….

We apologize for the ramblings of our typist. He has been sacked. Let us continue with the electrifying sequel to Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park mix…

Welcome to Montana, The hottest place on the planet earth. If anyone visited from New York, they would melt. That's what Chief Brody thought as he trudged through this oven. He admired the skeletons of precious prehistoric creatures that disappeared off the face of the earth eons ago. Yeah, he admired them, but hated the heat. Some guy told him to meet p with an "Alan Grant" of sorts… _It's too darn hot here…_ thought Brody. He had just experienced an adventure with a 35 foot terror that tired him out. He nearly got killed. His wife, Ellen, was worried sick about him. Brody trudged through the red sand in the blazing heat… WHOOP-PUNK! Brody's face was burning… so were his eyes. He couldn't see anything. He got up… and saw some cow folk boy dancing around like a complete and total moron. "Hello…" Said Brody, a little annoyed.

"Howdy thar!" said the man who looked like he just walked out of a western.

"Why did you trip me?"

"Why don't pigs fly?"

"Why did you trip me!"

"Why am I here?"

"Why did you trip me!"

"Why does Pepsi copy off of Coke?"

"WHY THE HECK DID YOU TRIP ME!"

"WHY THE HECK DOES MY IPOD TASTE FUNNY!"

"YOU ARE SO DUMB!"

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWW!"

Brody walked away from this lunatic, sand all over his face. He walked into some old white trailer, and met a man in a cowboy hat, along with a man with a white beard, and another man with a cowboy hat. "Hello?" said Brody.

"HOLA!" said Bobathan.

"Hello." Said Alan and Indy in unison.

"여보세요. 나의 이름은BobathanSteengoolbooper이다. 나는 나의 섬에 여행에 너를 초대하고 싶으면. 나는Amityville안에 백상어에 너의 모험에 관하여 듣고 우리들이 공룡을 절멸할것을 돕l것을 좋아할텐데 너가."

"What did he say?" Asked Brody, confuzzled.

"He said: Hello. My name is Bobathan Steengoolbooper. I would like to invite you on a trip to my island. I heard about your adventure with the Great White shark in Amityville and would like you to help us exterminate dinosaurs."

"What! Dinosaurs!"

And with that, Brody fainted.


	2. Bahama Mammas and Aerosmith

Finallique! A Review! On with the story!

After Brody was knocked out, Alan, Bobathan and Indy carried him onto a plane. Shortly after the plane took off and flew AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLL the way to Florida, Refueled, then went to... The Bahamas.

"Hello, I'll have 2 Bahama mammas and a…" Alan looked over at Bobathan.

"A Chocolate milk," Said Bobathan. The waiter eyed him.

"Oh, and one of those Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches with the Barney cups."

"Uh, Thanks." Said Alan as he went off to Bahama Airport.

The plane took off again and Brody woke up. "1.21 jigawatts, great Scott!" He randomly blurted out. The plane continued flying to Isla Sorna. Then… They were shot out.

"Nazis… I hate Nazis…" Said Indy.

"It's the 90's, there are no Nazis moron!" Said Alan

"Now there are." Said Indy.

A bullet hit Bobathan in the arm.

"Eh cherry juice, yaaaaaaaaaaay!" Bobathan began licking his arm and… Enjoying it?

Brody helped cover Bobathan's wounds while Alan and Indy argued.

Alan was holding a history book. "Hitler shot himself."

"Then… we must have went through a time portal."

"No, Aliens!"

"Monkeys!"

"Oranges!"

"Blue!"

"Yellow!"

"Red!"

"Green!"

"Nova Scotia!"

"Bermuda!"

"Triangle!"

"Sea Monster!"

"Kraken!"

"Wait… well maybe the Nazis got sent through a time portal…"

"Good idea."

The Nazis were still shooting at the plane. A sailor looked up. It was Quint, with robotic legs. "Arg, it be ye flying Swiss cheese!"

The plane was still flying, and the Nazis flew away.

They flew toward Isla Sorna. The dinosaurs were looking.

Still Looking.

Looking…

Looooooooking….

'This seems familiar.' Alan and Bobathan thought.

Still looking… Then the plane crashed into a Spinosaur's head, the head ripped off and the plane crashed.

"We've got to get out, there's a fire!" Screamed Brody.

"Find your Fligoojingleboopers!" Screamed Bobathan.

Alan broke open the door and he jumped out along with the rest. Ian Malcom was standing outside dancing. The group was puzzled. Raptors crowded around him and started waving their small arms. Ian started singing "Walk This Way" By Aerosmith.

The plane exploded and the Raptors ran away. "Ian! The Raptors… they didn't eat you?" Asked Alan.

"Nope, They seem to like Aerosmith."

"I see."

"Alan, what about Eoj and Bob?"

"Ah, leave them die."

They walked into a jungle. A Raptor was singing Dream on by Aerosmith while other Raptors were playing guitars and drums made of tree branches. Other Raptors were waving their small arms. Suddenly, Luke Skywalker walked in and the Raptors ate him. Jimmy Page walked in and the Raptors bowed to him and let him free. Then, a Spinosaurus came.

( Announcer. ) Will the group make it? Will Pepsi copy Coke again? Will Mr. Clean marry Mrs. Butter worth? Will Spongebob eat corn? Will blue turn yellow, will black turn blue, will apples rule the world? Find out next on, Indiana Jones, JP Mix episode 654… Errr, 2.


	3. Spam, Green eggs and ham, and anger

"Alan, what are we going to do?" Said Bobathan like a little girl.

"…"

The Spinosaur then spontaneously died. A computer fell out of it's mouth. "Finally, a way out!" Screamed Brody. "I hate computers…" Said Alan. "I don't know how to type…" Said Brody. All eyes went to Bobathan. "Oh dear God no…" said Alan. "We have to, Alan." Said Brody. "Yes, so this computer thingiemijinger can get us out of here?" Said Alan. Bobathan signed on official help forum. "Okay, type, help, stuck on Isla Sorna." Said Alan.

Bobathan typed: Lyke OMGZ HI THERE LIKE TOTALLY OMGZTH YEAH HUH OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH   TOTALLY YEAH OMGZ!

3 seconds later they got banned for spamming. "Bobathan, you moron I didn't tell you to Spam!"

"I know you told me to can!"

"Huh?"

"Lamb?"

"Huh?"

"Jam?"

"Uhmm…."

"Yam"

"Grrr…"

"Green eggs and ham?"

"ROAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRR!"

Alan randomly turned into a Raptor from complete anger, clawed Bobathan and turned back.

"M'Kay I'm better."

The group walked away.


	4. Beer and flatulence

I'm Back…

The group was silent. They kept walking through the jungle until they felt the ground shake. "Oh no, not a T-Rex." Said Alan.

"I think it's something worse…" Said the rest of the group at once.

All of a sudden, a Spinotrioonxtorhipposaurus walked out of the trees.

"That's not a dinosaur!" Said Alan.

"That's a sad excuse for one…" Said Malcom.

"Say, do you have directions to a boat?" asked Bobathan.

"Yeah, turn left on 42nd street, - the one with the burnt car – and then turn onto dead Muldoon street, - the one with Muldoon's hat hanging from a tree – and then turn to riverside drive, - the one with a stream of water running through it -." Said the Spinotrioonxtorhipposaurus.

"Thanks."

The group walked toward the boat.

"100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 bottles of beer on the wall, 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 90,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,999 bottles of beer on the wall." Sung Bobathan.

"We're at the boat."

"Let's get out of this chaosishtical place." Said Malcom.

They all got on the boat and drove out to the ocean.

"But we must exterminate dinosaurs!" Said Bobathan.

"Listen Hammond…" Said Alan

"Bobathan."

"Bobathan… Let's just get out of here."

"Never!"

Alan hit Bobathan on the top of the head and knocked him out.

"Hey, look a shark!" Said Malcom. The shark reared up on the side of the boat. It was a cardlon megaladon. "Bwahh!" Screamed Brody. He took out a gun and shot the shark. The shark exploded because it had a lot of gas.

"It smells like flatulence…" Said Malcom.

"Shut up, Ian."

They drove off and finally landed in Florida. Something was following them…Ian got in a rental car along with Alan, Bobathan, Indy, and Brody. Ian started playing "Dude looks like a lady" on the radio. Raptors started running down the street screaming like fangirls. "Pick up the speed, Ian…" Said Alan. The group drove off into the sunset with crazy raptors following them. The end… Or is it?... coming soon… Chapter 5…


	5. Dinos in the City and Spaghetti Stomachs

Miami, Florida

John was working at Blockbuster. It had been a boring day. Suddenly, a customer! John gasped and pranced around like a juvenile female raptor. Speaking of raptors, three raptors walked in and ate John alive. "Meh tummy lookie like spaghetti." Declared John as he, errr, died… The Raptors stood in front of a TV and watched Star Wars. After that the Raptors ran out of the Blockbuster and managed to hijack a car. They drove up to Burger King.

"Hello, my name is Dwight Shnorglewimer, and thank you for coming to Burger King." Said a nerdy voice. The Raptor driving the car roared. "So that will be a double cheeseburger and three cokes." Said the nerdy voice. The car sped up to where you receive the food. "You look gorgeous today, madam." Said the nerd to the MALE raptor. The raptor grabbed the cheeseburger with his mouth and drove out without paying. The raptors began fighting in the car for the cheeseburger, the car spun out and it crashed.

Meanwhile….

2 miles outside of Miami.

"Let's stay at this motel." Said Ian. "Potatoes are funny." Said Bobathan. "Hi." Said Ian. "Yellow!" Screamed Brody. "Blue." Said Alan. They were all obviously tired. Very.Tired. They walked in the Motel, and watched the news.

"Hello, this is pennywhursht news, and I am your anchorman Bobathan McSteengoolbooper."

"Me Cousin!" Screamed Bobathan.

"And that's how a goat's bladder ended up on my car windshield. In other news, Dinosaurs are running around on a rampage and killing people."

"Bwahh!" Screamed Ian, Alan, and Brody.

"Hi." Said Bobathan.

"We must attract them." Said Ian, so he began blasting Aerosmith out the window. Within 2 seconds the Raptors were there. "Squiggly! " Screamed Bobathan. The Raptors ran in the Hotel. A raptor jumped on Brody. Brody hit, raptor kicked, Brody bit, Raptor bit. Brody won somehow. A huge roar. All the raptors ran away. Then, a T-Rex walked up to the window. "Bobathan…" Said Alan.

"Oh I forgot… I decided to make a Jurassic Park in Miami and brought a T-Rex here." The T-Rex ripped through the window and wall and grabbed Ian in it's mouth.

A cliffhanger. Do ye like? Part III is coming soon ( within the next 300 years…) I just felt that I needed to make this Part the shortest part.


End file.
